Welcome 2025

I didn't even get a chance to start my annual first post of the year before things went bad for us in the United States of America.  We attacked Venezuela over the weekend and are about to annex it, at least temporarily.  

Every year, I revisit what to do with this blog.  It takes more effort than it use to for me to write posts that even I'm interested in, but I also like the archiving feature of looking back on things I have pretty much forgotten about.

So on to it. Last year there was a noticeable decline in recruiters reaching out to me.  I still got some interviews and even had a job that lasted not quite a month (I  need to finish the writeup on that one).  But I think it is safe to say my Document Management SME career is over.

 The holidays turned out better than expected.  My BILs and I didn't have any clashes or agenda arguments.  It's not just that we were on our best behavior, but I think it's also because we are older geezers now and it's just easier to find a way to get along.  

That's not to say it was perfect, there were still some remnants of the old: talking over one another/struggling to be heard.  Trying to find the best way to achieve a desired outcome.  But it was a lot easier than in the past.  Confederate Jethro even tried to bond with me but his misogyny made it hard for me to go along with it.  

After the Adamas got back to Michigan, my wife and her sister talked.  Apparently I annoyed my BIL by putting too much cardboard on the Solo Fire Pit we "borrowed" from the Father-in-Law.  Now keep in mind I'm hearing what was told to my wife by her sister.  I'm sure BIL was annoyed if I put too much cardboard in and created too much ash.  But I wasn't the only one doing it.  And he likely said it more in a making conversation with his wife -- who still tries to pick fights with him whenever she can  -- way, than a pissed off way.  

Also, as he didn't talk to me about it, I really cannot be bothered to be upset about this information.  I have bigger things to worry about.

Chicago Baseball in October: Over and Done

After losing two games against the Brewers, the Chicago Cubs did a rare thing since the playoff format changed some time ago: they forced a Game 5.  I did not expect that to happen and actually had a reasonable belief they might be able to pull it off.

Alas, they did not.  Milwaukee won and moved on.  But I'm grateful that the Cubs gave us fans 8 more games beyond the regular season.   Next Year.

Meanwhile, I was able to watch the Bears on MNF and they similarly beat the Commanders to how the Commanders beat them last year.

I'm beyond annoyed that I cannot watch this week's game against the New Orleans Saints.  New Orleans is closer to Olive Branch/Memphis than either Philadelphia or Minneapolis.  But the networks are forcing us to watch that game.

Some Random Thoughts

My cats seem to have an implicit agreement between them not to cuddle with the same human being at the same time. This was not always the case and I definitely remember it not being the case with our previous cats.  Elsa has become more of a cuddy cat than she used to be but still isn't a heavy snuggler like Ryder.

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You meet the same people in different forms throughout life.  In college, I met a guy named Troy on the first day of moving into the dorms.  He seemed like a good enough guy but there was something that my spidey sense said don't get too close.  In retrospect, I should have hung out with him more.  

20 years later, on my first day of orientation at a new job, I met Greg W.  We became work friends and there are definitely some similarities between Greg and Troy.  

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I have a related strange theory.  The light at the end of the tunnel we see when we die is actually us going through the birth canal and being born into a new life (or C-section or whatever form we are born unto).  

But here's the thing: we get to take a tiny portion of our knowledge, experience, wisdom, or whatever.  but really tiny.  that's why some people are naturally good at math or writing, etc. and maybe you can trade for looks and athletic skills, I don't make the rules.  it's just a theory.

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 I often wake up in the middle of the night and remember some random memory and it is so cringe.  I really was born with two strikes and played against people born on 2nd and 3rd base.  

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In case it's not obvious, I am not a fan of #elfontheshelf.  When I was a kid, if a doll moved in your house, you cut that Fucker up before it could multiply and burned it for good measure.  luckily, we only have a week left of this nonsense.

We didn't have EOS when I was growing up.  And until we had children, I only had an obtuse cursorial understanding of what it was.  It seems it started out innocently enough: you moved a doll around the house after putting your kids to bed (instead of doing anything that might lead to more kids) and each morning they would try to find it (instead of getting ready for school).  

But someone, I suspect the mommy bloggers (what we currently call influences) had to take it to the next level.  They came up with elaborate concepts and designs and you are a lesser parent if your kid doesn't have a good story to share at school.  

I didn't get the choice to opt-in or out of it.  But this year Nightingale has decided that I have to come up with some ideas.  The thing is, there are no Easy Elf On The Shelf ideas.  If you google and find an article with 25 ideas, each one just has that one thing you don't have in house to make it work.

Election Aftermath

Donald Trump managed to repeat history and become the second U.S. president ever to return to the Oval Office after losing reelection four years earlier. (The first was Grover Cleveland in 1893.) 

While he lost the (irrelevant) popular vote the first two times he ran for office, he won it this time, along with the necessary Electoral College votes.

To say we are disappointed is an understatement. We knew our votes didn't really matter in Mississippi-Stan. Our in-laws alone canceled our votes 2-1. But there was a glimmer of hope these last few weeks, and to use the coin of the phrase, we were nauseously optimistic. 

In the days and weeks to come, Pundits will explain why Kamala Harris lost to the Fanta Menace.  Among the list will be:

• Racism
• Misogyny
• Muslim and Arab Americans disappointment with Biden's policy re: Israel and Palestine
• The democratic party's inability to appeal to the progressive left
• Voter suppression
• gerrymandering
• 3rd party siphoning votes
• Not having a legitimate primary where people could truly choose the nominee

It's a combination of all of the above.

Furthermore, he has the House the Senate, and SCOTUS.  We are truly screwed.

Cashing it out

I've been carrying this box of coins and bills around for as long as I can remember from apartment to apartment, to condo, to house, to house.  The best I've managed to do was combine them all into one container.  

Well, today I finally took them to a local coin collector and he confirmed what I always suspected.  99% of them are just worth the currency as printed.  I sold twelve $2 bills for $3 a piece and a silver half dollar for $7.50, bringing my grand total to $43.50.  

People hold onto coins and other collectibles way longer than they should, believing that there might be that one item that will fetch a high price.  It doesn't help that a story comes out every few months where someone found a rare piece of art worth money.

The coin collector told me I might want to hold on to some of my silver certificate dollar bills (he didn't specify which ones).  He agreed that I'm just as well off either taking everything to my bank and depositing it or reintroducing everything back into circulation.  And that's what I will do.  There is no point in passing these coins on to Moose and Squirrel, hoping they will be worth something more one day.  If they only increased 1% in 30+ years, there is no need to keep them around.  Is it possible they could become more valuable in a Twilight Zone screenplay sort of way?  Perhaps, but that would be such a strange set of circumstances that it isn't even worth entertaining.

Salt Shaker and Baseball Games

This isn't a Living in the South Thing:  Even back in Chicago, even before the World Series run in 2015, it was getting harder and harder to watch Cubs games.  

Pay Us! 

I'm too lazy to look it all up but it might have started with the 2015 playoff games and only being able to watch those on streaming services.  

I don't like the Cubs, let alone baseball enough to pay for a subscription.  But i do like the Bears and football.  It was worth it to buy the YouTube TV Sunday package (or whatever they call it) so I could watch my terrible Bears games.

I have to make a decision on whether to renew the package this year in the hopes that Caleb Williams elevates the Bears and they are at least exciting to watch, or save the money and do something else on Sundays.  

What a waste of a perfectly good power cord:  For Christmas last year, at Nightingale's request, I got her this electronic salt and pepper shaker set.  it came with a warranty and I actually remembered to register the product.  

One of the shakers broke, in that you couldn't lock it closed because the glass was broken.  I contacted Cuisinart support via telephone and they told me they don't replace individual shakers and would have to send me a new unit.

Wasteful, but okay.  But the catch was, I had to cut the power cord and send them a picture.  I asked why and the support person agreed this was wasteful, but policy.  Also, while she took all my info, she did not send me any email with instructions or confirmation.  She said that the email address was just to send me tracking information after I sent the picture.

So I do as instructed, which admittedly is a rarity for me when something doesn't make any sense.  I get a confirmation "we got your email" message.  After a bit of time goes but I contacted them again, via the website online form (I should have done this in the first place).

They claimed they never got my email with the picture of the severed cord.  Oh no, now you've done it.  I emailed back attaching the email with my picture and the "We got your email" message attached.  They respond that they cannot open/read the attachments.  I copy and paste the picture within the email and they tell me they will expedite sending me the shaker.  It still took another week or two before it arrived but I did get it.

Since the warranty is now completely over and I don't want to go through this again, I've saved the working shaker and power station although I really would have liked to have a second working cord.

Practical Life Lesson: Genuine Offer versus Conversational Device

 Over at the defunct ChicagoNow, I did a post about Life Lessons.  It was a gallery so when I exported that blog to my personal (unused) WordPress site, they didn't come over.  I had to use Wayback Machine to get them.  I figured putting the more pertinent ones here might be beneficial.

Practical Life Lesson: Genuine Offer versus Conversational Device

It’s really hard to distinguish 'Conversational Device’ from ‘Genuine Offer’ until you’ve been around the block a few times because Conversational Devices are often gift-wrapped as Genuine Offers.

Simply put, this is someone offering to do something for you with no intention of actually doing anything for you. Usually, it's an unintentional thing. At the time they sincerely believe they will deliver on their promise. But the reality is they just won't be there when you think they will. Other times it is totally intentional and premeditated. It is how this person gets their ya-yas which is Swedish for get's off.

Have you ever run into a friend who says something along the line of "We have to get together sometime." Maybe you take the bait and say sure and you reach out to them. In a healthy relationship on Planet Normal, you get together reasonably soon after that chance encounter. Other times you volley back and forth on dates that could work. You find that the person is either busy or non-committal on any date thrown out. Sometimes it takes a while to realize that the other party just doesn't want to get together.

You want to believe the best in people and it takes a few burns until the naive goes away. What's worse is that for some strange reason, our society seems to look down on the person who fell for it, not the person who dished it out.

Practical Life Lesson: Don't give someone a fork when they ask for a spoon

 Over at the defunct ChicagoNow, I did a post about Life Lessons.  It was a gallery so when I exported that blog to my personal (unused) WordPress site, they didn't come over.  I had to use Wayback Machine to get them.  I figured putting the more pertinent ones here might be beneficial.

Practical Life Lesson: Don't give someone a fork when they ask for a spoon

This one has a lot of subtle nuances. If someone literally hasn't eaten in a week you give them whatever is on your plate. However, if they just skipped lunch, giving them your cheeseburger doesn't do them any good if they are vegan, or lactose intolerant.

Give people what they say they want or need or get out of the way. People generally want to help one another, however, some people just aren't good at it for one reason or another. I like to say people mean well but execute poorly. Sometimes it's because they chose the one type of help that doesn't require them to get off the sofa.

Other times it is because some people want to get the credit for helping out without doing any of the actual work. Even when the level of effort to help out is far less than the effort of looking like you're helping out.

Practical Life Lesson : Don't Try to Control The Weather

  Over at the defunct ChicagoNow, I did a post about Life Lessons.  It was a gallery so when I exported that blog to my personal (unused) WordPress site, they didn't come over.  I had to use Wayback Machine to get them.  I figured putting the more pertinent ones here might be beneficial.

Practical Life Lesson: Don't Try to Control The Weather

There are things in this world that you can control, like what you eat for breakfast, what you wear to the office, and even how many books you read or shoes you buy. On the other hand, there are many things you just cannot control, like traffic or other people's actions, or as indicated: the weather.

So stop trying to control it anyway. Yes, it would be awesome if the person you gave your number to at a great party yesterday called you today. It may or may not happen but more importantly, it’s outside your powers.

Sure, it would be best if the lady standing to the left on the escalator moved to the right like everyone else, but it’s too late, she is.

Dwelling on things that you cannot control in this world will make you crazy like a bag of unpetted kittens and it will do you no good. it's wasted energy. …focus on those things that you have direct control over and indirect influence on.

Let. It. Go!

Practical Life Lesson: Cats and Dogs and Social Maintenance

 Over at the defunct ChicagoNow, I did a post about Life Lessons.  It was a gallery so when I exported that blog to my personal (unused) WordPress site, they didn't come over.  I had to use Wayback Machine to get them.  I figured putting the more pertinent ones here might be beneficial.

Practical Life Lesson: Cats and Dogs and Social Maintenance

There's a famous pet meme out there. I'm including the picture but the text is "I cannot come to your cat's birthday party. My dog is getting married that day." There are various incantations and the one I've pictured goes the extra step of pet owner A insulting pet owner B.

There are at least two life lessons here. The first is that if you want people to care about your "cat's wedding" you have to care about their "dog's birthday party."

The second is that people will treat your "cat's wedding" like it is the most unimportant thing in the world and make you feel bad for even suggesting they be part of it, but will expect you to drop everything for their "dog's birthday party."

Practical Life Lesson: 11th Hour Cancellations

Over at the defunct ChicagoNow, I did a post about Life Lessons.  It was a gallery so when I exported that blog to my personal (unused) WordPress site, they didn't come over.  I had to use Wayback Machine to get them.  I figured putting the more pertinent ones here might be beneficial.

Practical Life Lesson: 11th Hour Cancellations

When someone cancels plans with you at the last minute, the reason falls into one of two buckets.

 Bucket#1: something came up last minute that prevented the person from participating. The boss implemented an arbitrary but firm deadline. A child got sick.

Bucket #2: the person never wanted to do it in the first place and the pressure finally was too much that they hit the panic button and canceled, often through some backdoor method like a text or voice mail.

The way you know which bucket it was is whether or not they follow up to reschedule if/when things calm down. If they reach out and say something along the lines of hey things were crazy last week but everything seems back to normal, how about we try again?

Passport Missconnection

We need to get passports for our children.  We are going to Niagra Falls in the fall for a school field trip and because of the way things are, Passports are needed for entry to Canada.  Because our kids are minors,  both parents have to apply in person (or sign an affidavit).  

The post office here in Olive Branch only does that on weekdays.  Because Nightingale doesn't have a lot of PTO accrued yet, we don't want to spend it on something like this.  The hours are 10 - 3 so we also would have to take the kids out of school.  

We scheduled an appointment for last Saturday with a PO in Memphis because they had Saturday hours.  Obviously, they were booked a month out.  

Apparently, since we crossed State Lines to do this, we needed two forms of ID.  Nightingale read the instructions 4 times.  It didn't say anything about 2 pieces of ID.  Our trip was wasted because I only had my driver's license.  Spoiler Alert: it does say two forms are needed if you cross state lines.

We are so used to OB and Memphis being "one place" that we sometimes forget we are crossing state lines and subject to different rules.  Alcohol for instance is still not sold in Mississippi on Sundays.

I've never seen this anywhere else

And the thing is, I had a feeling I should just bring my passport along.  But I didn't.  Because I don't trust the little voices in my head anymore.  

We did have the option of submitting the form but the lady said it might come back asking for more proof.  She didn't suggest we run home, get my passport, and come back and I didn't ask if that was an option.  our appointment was at 12 and they close at 1 pm, so it would have been tight anyway.  But next time I will ask.

Olive Branch and South Haven Post Offices do take walk-ins and appointments during the week.  Nightingale doesn't want to use up her PTO on this but we are off next week for a trip anyway.  We think we can hit the PO on the way home and get this done.

COW: Prayer after soccer games

My Crisis of the Week is this:  after the game, my daughter's soccer coach gets the kids together in a post-game huddle.  He says a prayer.  Of course, anyone who doesn't want to participate can sit there quietly.  

If I say anything, my daughter might be targeted. I'm sure he wouldn't mind if I came along and uttered a Muslim or Jewish prayer. God, I hate this state.  maybe I should find a church down here and start playing soccer during the homily. 

Playing in the rain...and mud

I acknowledge that I'm disproportionally upset about this.  I've known about it for a few weeks and Natasha is fine with just sitting there silently.  I think I'm really upset because of all the other things going on. 

I'm not allowed to vent in the traditional ways.  I don't even have anyone to vent to down here.  And Nightingale has censored me and chided me when I do rage out.  

How About those New Year Resolutions?

A friend posted on her blog (I cannot link because it is private) that many people don't bother with New Year's Resolutions "because they recognize it as a hopeless exercise in futility."

 My goto NY resolution was to be in a better place, "physically, mentally, spiritually, psychologically, etc". 

I used to also "give up" my resolution for Lent.  :-)

One thing I recently thought about is: you have all year to meet your NY Resolution.  Unless it is oddly specific, i.e. I want to get my taxes filed by March 1st, you can start over as many times as it takes to get it done.

How snow fall can snowball in a Mid-South city

Because of holidays and snow days, my kids have been out of school more days than they have been in school so far this year.

It's understandable why they didn't have school yesterday as the snow was finally melting.  Not having it today is a questionable decision.  I get that they had to make it based on how conditions looked at 8 pm last night.  They couldn't count on the snow and ice being melted by the time school buses needed to pick up kids (it mostly was).

But honestly, it is damn near impossible to work while my kids are home.  First, they seem to know when I'm on a call and they come into the kitchen area and make lots of noise.

Second, Boris is an eating machine and I have to keep him from raiding the fridge and eating all the food at once.  

It's a balmy 50 degrees right now which is good for melting the last remnants of the snowfall.  But it also means it's wet and muddy so playing outside is not an option.

The snow also affected garbage pickup.  It was already going to be a day late because of MLK Day.  For some reason here, a Monday holiday causes everything to shift one day whereas in Chicago it would be caught up by Thursday.  But the snow made it impossible for the trucks to do pickup so we skipped a week.  Apparently, there were problems yesterday and they are gonna try to catch up today.  

We have two garbage bins which average about 1.5 fullness unless we have family over.  But our recycle bin is almost full and I still have some boxes and our usual daily production to figure out.  I could run some over to my FIL since he only recycles cardboard boxes.

headed to Chicago

 We are headed to Chicago for a week via Mt Vernon.  We stay at the Drury Inn to split the drive into two manageable 4-hour legs.

Katniss has graciously offered her house for us to stay in since she and the family are going out of town for a vacation with some extended family.

I didn't tell a lot of people we will be in town but I did tell a few.  It's hard to see everyone and it's just easier to do our own thing with an occasional lunch or dinner with another adult.

financially, we really shouldn't be doing this trip.  We are doing it so my mom can see her grandkids again, especially since I'm not sure we will make our annual Thanksgiving Day visit.  But it will be good for the kids and for me.  

If my mom could be a functional adult, we would have a better solution.  She could sell her crapshack in Humboldt Park and buy a nicer home.  Then we'd have a place to stay and could visit more often.  But she is afraid of change and doesn't care that I will have to spend tons of money when she finally dies and I have to deal with her hoarder issues.

Keeping the Faith

 So it's been 2 years since I was laid off from Big Audit 2.0.  Since then I've talked to a zillion recruiters, had dozens of interviews, and one contract gig.  The contract gig, despite its drama, was more of a liferaft than I ever imagined.  It lets me reframe the narrative from "I've been unemployed since July 2020" to "I've been unemployed since May 2022".  Because without a job, I have no power.  No control over my life.  

To say I'm losing faith is an understatement.  I know I've blown a few interviews, but it doesn't seem mathematically possible to have blown them all so badly that no one will take a chance on me.

To be sure, there have been 5 places this year alone that should have taken me on, based on my experience alone.  Two were even contract gigs which would be low risk if it didn't work out.

• There were interviews given by people who don't know how to conduct an interview.  
• There were interviews where the role described did not match the job description given.
• There was a job interview where one of the interviewer was drinking wine.
• There was a job interview where the interviewer was wearing an ill-fitting T-shirt.
• There was a job interview where the interviewer picked his nose.

In my field, there are a few options.  I can work for a law firm and be a Widget Engineer.  They might call it something different.  If I'm lucky, I can find another Audit or non-law firm company that uses the No-Name Software.  Finally, the last option is to work for one of the consulting firms that get hired for short-term implementation or upgrade projects.

And I'm so ANGRY.  Angry that my Office Nemesis is still employed there.  Angry that he was allowed to bully and harass me with no repercussions.  

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Don't look now, it's May

There isn't too much to write about and yet there is.  I should be posting updates about stuff we are doing at the new house.  For instance, we got a rain barrel, and a composter and planted some plants and vegetables.  We also finally hung a few more pieces of art around the house.

I'm slowly clearing out some stuff.  Take this painting for instance.  I bought it from a street vendor in NYC back in the mid-90s.  I thought it was cool and new agey, but really it was just a cheap piece of wall covering.  I don't really have a good place to put it here, so I'm gonna toss it.  What's cute is that Natassa said I should sell it.  

My contract gig ends this Friday and I have mixed feelings.  On the one hand, I'm happy to be free of the insane-O Project Manager.  On the other hand, it was easy money, of which I now need to find a new source.

I had an interview last week which was okay but I doubt I'll get a callback.  The problem is most people don't know how to conduct an interview and when you ask a person who maybe does one interview every 2-3 years, it takes a while to get any momentum.  They tend to talk about things that no interviewee is interested in unless they get the job.  They often overexplain and over answer (sometimes the answer simply: The color Blue).  

As the interviewee, you have to be polite and not interrupt.   It wasn't until the very end, when we were out of time, that I realized what he was looking for.  I'll try to do better next time, but next time will be a different person, a different need, and a different format.  

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My mood right now

Recruiter: Hey we are looking for a LEFT-HANDED WIDGET Maker. I see that you are a Left-handed Widget Maker. Are you interested?

Me: sure.

Recruiter: Great, send me your updated resume. Because the resume I have, the one that shows your vast experience of being a Left-Handed Widget Maker just isn’t good enough, for reasons.

Me: !@#$.

My frustration is that 1) if I were still working at my last employer, my resume would be fine and 2) the contract gig I’m working on isn’t a game-changing experience. No one looking for a Left-Handed Widget Maker will choose me over another LH Widget Maker based on the 6 months of pushing a button on a lame project that I’ve been working on.

Rene and Georgette Magritte with Their Dog After the War

 There's bad stuff going on across The Pond.  For posterities' sake, I'm referring to Russia invading Ukraine and half of America thinking that is okay.  Some of them are relations by blood or marriage.  

https://youtu.be/0vDAubIlYOs?t=12 

Last night (2/24/2022 in case I don't post this quickly) I cried for the first time in a long time.  I'm Polish but what is happening right now mirrors what happened to my grandparents.  

I reached out to a Virtual Friend who is Russian.  She told me the following:

Hi, thank you for your message. I greatly appreciate it. This war is a tragedy for Ukraine, Russia, Europe and the entire world. All Russians I know are of course against it. But nobody asked us. And, of course this war will bring poverty to each and every Russian person and will kill the economy. Hope you are well

 

Update:  it's 3/24/2022 and the invasion continues.  Ukraine has done an outstanding job of holding Russian troops off, but it's still war and people are dying.

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Thank you for reading and I hope you will comment below. Do me a favor? Click my "like" button and join our Facebook community.
You'll find funny, informative links and interesting pictures.  Don't worry, your Facebook feed won't get overwhelmed.

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