They keep stringing me along

 Yesterday at 4:49 pm  Call-Center Recruiter reached out to me to tell me that Big Bank client wanted to do a 2nd interview.  He said I was shortlisted.  But when I pressed him, he said the other two candidates were also shortlisted.  

The available spots were today at 10:30 am or Thursday.  I didn't want to drag this out.  I also have a crew here working on the bathroom, and an HVAC guy coming to look at my AC, which is not behaving correctly.  Because that's how my life works.

As far as interviews go, this one went well.  We figured out the solution to the technical issues (log in as a guest).  That doesn't mean i have the job.  The primary person who was supposed to be on the call didn't make it.  And the techy who interviewed me had better things to do and was quite happy when half our time was over.  He did say I did well, and I think he was being genuine.

But here's the thing.  the job spec is for a hybrid with 3 days in a Big Bank Office.  If any of the other candidates live in a city where just one member of the existing team lives, that is an advantage because in in-person meetings.  

And I just checked.  Memphis has Big Bank locations, but I'm not sure they have offices for back office staff.  That could be a problem...for a fucking job that does not require being on site for any good reason!

Going through the motions

 Follow-up to my job hunting post.  Have not heard from or reached out to law firm recruiter.  He obviously found some other candidates and/or read the fine print and realized I'd need to live in a particular city for that role.

The consulting recruiter asked me to suggest some times for an interview this week, and I gave him a half dozen, in order or preference.  He, or the person he forwarded them to, didn't "notice" my mention of Central Time Zone.  This is a common occurrence among lazy, incompetent people.  The recruiter also sent both versions of my resume that he requested rather than pick one.  Again, lazy.

I decided to just have the interview an hour earlier and get it out of the way.  It actually was one of the better interviews I've had but that is mostly because the majority of interviews suck.  

Since I had this interview and NG managed to get me a long overdue doctor's appointment, I proactively reached out to the Call-Center Recruiters to tell them that my Wednesday was no longer an option.  They called and what an amazing coincidence: the client reached out to them at the exact moment I sent that email.

They begged me to have a call with them on the same day.  So for those keeping score at home, two interviews with 2 hours between (thanks to time zone screw ups) followed by a doctor appointment.

I did it but regret it because the call didn't happen because the  Bank people had a Production Outage they had to deal with.  There were also technical issues because they were using WebEx and they have it so locked down, I could join the call but no audio.  

WebEx!   What, Skype wasn't available?  it's like using AOL chat instead of Slack. We rescheduled the interview for the next day and it went somewhat okay.  Still had technical issues so we just did a phone in.  They asked a question I couldn't answer and couldn't bullshit.  Call-Center Recruiter told me afterwards they had interviewed two other people so unless they fucked up more, I'm not getting this role.

Finally, Mid-August is bad for interviews because people are squeezing in last of summer vacations and Labor Day is fast approaching.  No one wants to work this time of year.  And interview fatigue is a thing.  If they talked to two other people before getting to me, they are exhausted of asking the same questions.  Throw in the technical issues so they didn't get a chance to introduce themselves and the overall dysfunction they have emanated and I think I will have to just settle for working overnights at the Home Depot.  

Still you gotta try

In my industry, I have three paths, if you will, for employment.  I could work for a law firm that uses the No-Name Software I am a SME in.  Unfortunately, the law firms in Memphis do not use it, so I either have to relocate to a state where a law firm that does use it has an office, or find one of the few firms that are set up to use remote workers from anywhere.  Or I get a contract job and the 3rd party is set up to pay me from the fee they collect from the firm, while skimming a little off the top for "administrative costs".

The second option is to work for a consulting firm that specializes in No-Name Software.  The challenge here is that I'm a tad bit too seasoned in that I would not likely be pushed around as much today as I allowed when I consulted in the naughts.  It doesn't help that I haven't been working in over a year either.

The third option is a non-legal entity that also uses No-Name Software.  This is my preferred option because for all its ups and downs, Corporate America is better than Legal America.

As it so happens, this month I have been contacted by three recruiters for a role at each.  

First up is a recruiter who previously reached out to me last year for a law firm role.  Apparently, someone else had already submitted my resume there without my knowledge or permission.  This time, he reached out to me about two weeks ago, for another law firm role, an hour before he left the office to go on vacation.  I'm not confident about this one because even though it is remote, the JD specifically mentions specific states one has to work in.  Recruiters miss this all the time because they just hear remote or assume they will find someone in those places.

The second is a guy who called me about a consulting gig at a place I interviewed at about 3 years ago to the date.  He actually acknowledged this but says the company has had an overhaul.  And he demonstrated this by reaching out to me periodically over the last couple of weeks to try and set up an interview.  Calendar invite pending.

Finally, a recruiter reached out to me about a role at a Big Bank that I would love to work for.  He is not the first to reach out about this role nor is it the first time.  This started in May but apparently the job req got put on hold.  At first it was contract.  then it was FTE.  Now it is back to contract.  And it is hybrid.  They would want me in a office 3x a week.  Chicago is one of those places.

So let's look at this.  Big Bank couldn't figure out the job req.  This happens a lot because of budgets and end of fiscal year, yadda, yadda, yadda.  Big Bank hired a bunch of low rent call center recruiter to fill this position instead of using their in-house people.  And the team is spread across several offices which means Teams Meeting but yet they want you in the office in one of those cities.

This screams disfunction and yet I would take this chance at earning money again in a heartbeat.  I don't even bother telling Ng about these interviews since they often go nowhere.  We would like to move back north and this might be a way but it seems to be on the highest difficulty setting.

If they actually hire me, I would have to move back to Chicago immediately.  katness said I could use her guestroom, but that would only last so long.  And the thought of being away from my kids for an extended length of time freightens me, inspite of their douche nuggetness.  

When we moved down here, NG knew it would only be two months of being separated.  This could take longer.  much longer.  

Note:   I'm writing these entries as they happen and as I have time to jot things down but I may not publish until months from now (or ever). Note: This post was written when the events were still fresh.  I waited for a while to post this because I didn’t want to risk my job-hunting efforts.

Summer is nearly over down here

I cannot, and I assume most other people, cannot discern any noticeable difference between 87, 89, and 92 degrees.  Or any temperature difference of just a few degrees.  I acknowledge that an 87-degree day can be miserable if there is humidity while a 92-degree day could feel just fine.

We are in the high 80s this week and although we can still get temps in the 90s throughout October, I would say that Summer is nearly over down here.  The mornings are cool and crisp and the evenings are completely bearable.  In another week or so, I'll be back to wearing long pants.  

It's been 7 months since I've earned a paycheck.  The week before Labor Day 4 Recruiters reached out to me.  Five if you count the one who cleared did a very lazy search and thought I'd be a perfect match for a skillset I do not possess.

In no particular order, Recruiter #1 was for a consulting gig I did not want, so I didn't even bother filling out the online app.  He faded away.

Recruiter #2 wrote up a cover letter for me but has also disappeared.  He felt that some of the gaps in my resume indicated I was having trouble finding a job.  While technically true, the idea that maybe a person would take time off from Corporate America wasn't even considered.

Recruiter #3 reached out to me the Tuesday after Labor Day and I handed off my resume but I haven't heard back.  They took a copy of the resume I had on LinkedIn and pasted into their template.

Recruiter #4 is arranging for a video call this week but hasn't confirmed if it will be tomorrow or Thursday.

Note: I'm not doing backflips following up with any of them because I know it is futile.  But I did realize something.  Gaps in your resume aren't so much about you not being able to get a job.  It's about you being able to exist without having a job.  Because if you can do it once, you can do it again.  And our Corporate America Overlord do not want a workforce that doesn't rely on them.

What should have been

 It always makes me a little sad when this image comes up in my On This Day in Facebook.  I really thought this would be my dream job.  I enjoyed going into the office, even though that was challenging with 2 two-year-olds that needed to be dropped off at daycare.

When things started going South I hoped I would make it to year 5 because that would be fully invested in the 401K match.  Not a huge deal but every bit helps.  I have been struggling to get new employment because of my age, my location, and my personality.

If I hadn't been laid off, would we still have moved down here?  Perhaps.  But maybe it would have been an anchor that would make it easier to move back.  We'll never know.  

Office Nemisis won.  

Back to the Beginning

 On Friday I got a phone call from the agency that "represents" me on my contract gig at No-Name Software Company Adjacent Company.

They told me that No-Name Software Company Adjacent Company is not renewing my contract and that my last day would be Feb 26th.  

While I'm not terribly upset that it ended, I wish it had gone on longer so I could use the experience to make my resume and LinkedIn profile more stable.  Because I've worked a few short-term contract jobs, I get penalized because:

• Recruiters want me to list every job to show I'm hireable;
• But the tasks and responsibilities are so mundane that no one would be impressed enough to choose me over another No-Name Software SME candidate.  

It is no coincidence that my Manager (Mel) rescheduled and canceled my One-On-One with her.  She, and our boss, don't like conflict and are just trying to hold onto their Corporate America jobs until they can retire.  They are on borrowed time because the Corporation that acquired their smaller company is not making money off their product.

What does irritate me is that Mel tried to pin it on me.  They could have, and did, go with Budget cuts.  But she also tried to put it on me that I didn't Step Up and In enough.  I should have been more of a self-starter.  let's ignore the snafu of my start date, or starting just as everyone is going on vacation after a long year of consulting.  

Translation:  I didn't realize I was going to have to be responsible for your Onboarding and be expected to help you succeed.  

Could I have been more aggressive?  Sure, but what would that have really accomplished when a company -- and by extension a team -- is somewhat dysfunctional?  I did my best to walk the line between asserting myself and respecting other people's downtime.  

  I'm writing these entries as they happen and as I have time to jot things down but I may not publish until months from now (or ever). Note: This post was written when the events were still fresh.  I waited for a while to post this because I didn’t want to risk my job-hunting efforts.

The offer

   I'm writing these entries as they happen and as I have time to jot things down but I may not publish until months from now (or ever). Note: This post was written when the events were still fresh.  I waited for a while to post this because I didn’t want to risk my job-hunting efforts.

I heard back from the recruiter today.  They want to offer me a contract position that could transition into FTE if I gel with the team.  They are also offering me less than we initially discussed.  

On the one hand, I have the luxury of being able to take $50/hr and not worry about making the rent.  On the other hand, the Job Description has not changed.  So they are trying to get Prime Rib at Pub Burger prices.

Update from the future:  The recruiter, who is jaunting around Europe right now came back with the following:

We are still getting some ducks in a row, but these are the details being discussed:

$60/hr

6-month contract (with option to promote to full-time after 3 months)

40 hours per week (minus holidays)

Exclusively working for us, but this is our preference (J thinks he will be able to keep you busy 😊)

I should know more on Monday.

10/12/23 1:39pm

The exclusive thing is because I asked about taking on a side gig if the work was anything like the contract job I had 2 years ago where I literally just earned money by pushing a button every hour.  It's telling that they don't want me to do anything like that even if it wouldn't interfere.  

Third and final Interview

   I'm writing these entries as they happen and as I have time to jot things down but I may not publish until months from now (or ever). Note: This post was written when the events were still fresh.  I waited for a while to post this because I didn’t want to risk my job-hunting efforts.

|The 3rd interview with No-Name Software Company Adjacent Company came and went.  The only timeslot was not ideal because it comes at the time I normally get in line to pick up Moose and Squirrel at school.  But since all these interviews have had Hard Stops after 30 minutes (this one should too) I decided to risk it because I should still be able to get in line before the school starts releasing students.

The interview wasn't as good as the first two.  We finished early and she asked the usually bullshit "what are you passionate about and what motivates you to come into the office" type interview question.

The obvious answer is "a fucking paycheck" but they don't want to hear that.  They want you to give them some bullshit bougie answer.  It's on par with asking "why do you want to work here".  They want a virtual blowjob and a pony.  

  

The Second Interview

  I'm writing these entries as they happen and as I have time to jot things down but I may not publish until months from now (or ever). Note: This post was written when the events were still fresh.  I waited for a while to post this because I didn’t want to risk my job-hunting efforts.

So the 2nd interview with No-Name Software Company Adjacent Company came and went.  As with the first interview, it was painless as far as interviews go.

And as with the first interview, as far as I can tell, it went well.  I don't recall if I grabbed the lead or let her ask the first question but she asked me why I got into technology.  That tells me that she, like many people, don't consider interviews as the primary part of their job.

Labor Laws are a bit lax down here

It's certainly better than the old guy who was going over my resume line by line and asking me things about my college major and who was my boss at a job almost two decades ago.  

I have  3rd and final interview today.  The only timeslot was not ideal because it comes at the time I normally get in line to pick up Moose and Squirrel at school.  But since all these interviews have had Hard Stops after 30 minutes (this one should too) I decided to risk it because I should still be able to get in line before the school starts releasing students.

10/5/2023 11:26 am

The Interview

 I'm writing these entries as they happen and as I have time to jot things down but I may not publish until months from now (or ever). Note: This post was written when the events were still fresh.  I waited for a while to post this because I didn’t want to risk my job-hunting efforts.

So the interview with No-Name Software Company Adjacent Company came and went.  As far as I can tell, it went well.  At the same time, there wasn't any moment I could point to that said "Yes they want me" or "No they won't hire me".  

As far as interviews go, this one was painless.  I took the lead and asked him to describe the role beyond what the recruiter told me and factoring in any changes in the Job Description (JD) since initial posting. 
 

The interview was conducted by a nice enough fellow who wears the title of Director but is really just a techie who has been doing this far too long.  We of course ran out of time before he could ask me any significant questions, had he the desire and ability to do so.

Best case he is kicking the can down the road and setting up a technical interview where I can really show my knowledge of the No-Name Software platform.  It seems all their products integrate with it so my knowledge gives me a leg up on other candidates, at least on paper.  

Nightingale has given me permission to stop job hunting and focus on being a SAHD.  We were good savers and she now has a good paying job in a low-cost-of-living state.  That said, I would like my own income and to keep padding our retirement funds.  

BTW, this role turns out to be more implementation consultant than customer solution oriented.  Honestly, I can do it if they give me a chance.  I really just want to be able to add to my resume and be able to subtract some of the pointless contract work I had to take on.

No-Name Software Company Adjacent

  I'm writing these entries as they happen and as I have time to jot things down but I may not publish until months from now (or ever). Note: This post was written when the events were still fresh.  I waited for a while to post this because I didn’t want to risk my job-hunting efforts. 

Near the end of last year, I interviewed for a job that I really wanted.  It was No-Name Software Company Adjacent, meaning my experience with that software platform would have been advantageous.  I had three rounds of interviews only to return from the holidays to a "We've made the decision to continue the process with another candidate"  only to see the job reposted on LinkedIn less than a month later.

This year has been even stranger in the job hunt because I had a few recruiters reach out about positions that weren't actually available yet, or the movement stalled or the Job Hunting Gods just want to fuck with me.

'bout to drop a sic album

My options are in-house at a law firm (or if I'm lucky, an in-house at a non-law firm), working for a consulting company, or one of the rare No-Name Software adjacent opportunities.

Even during the Remote Heyday, most law firms require you to live in a state where they have an office for tax compliance reasons.  And now they are pushing back to the office at least in Hybrid Mode.  

The consulting companies want someone with my No-Name Software Company experience, but not my Corporate America experience, because they want to take advantage of less seasoned employees.  And if we are being honest, a lot of people I've worked with over the years work at these places and they simply do not like me.

Finally, there are the No-Name Software Company Adjacent roles which are harder to find and I've already been passed up on 2-3.

I'm interviewing for one of those tomorrow but I have so little hope that I haven't even mentioned it to Nightingale.  Besides the usual lethargic haze, the cadence on this one has been abysmal.  It's a little fuzzy when I actually applied but I recall when I got a call (Sept 7th) from the in-house recruiter, my thought was "Wow I applied 2 weeks and I'm hearing from you now".

We had a call but ran out of time.  He did say he would present me and hope I moved forward.  When I didn't hear from him on Monday as he suggested, I reached out Tuesday via email.  He didn't respond until Thursday saying that he hadn't heard anything but would ping the person.

I waited until the middle of this week to send a "Hey what's going on" in the cacophony of Corporate America speak.  He responded EOD and said the directory wanted to interview me and set it up for tomorrow.

A couple of things.  The pace he responds to emails is ridiculous.  That tells me that he is inefficient, his company can't get things done in a timely fashion, or both.  

He declined my request for some pre-interview coaching so I don't really think I'm gonna ace this interview.   

an incesstrious industry

 This happened.

Senior recruiter reaches out to me at 12:24 pm 3/8/3023

we talk at 3:30 pm.  I explain how it's very likely one or more persons in his organization know me and doesn't like me.  he says he's going to submit my resume anyway.

this morning at  8:06 AM

Hi, I spoke with the team this AM. At this time, they are moving forward with another candidate already in the interview process. I appreciate your time yesterday. Feel free to keep in touch!

 

Sent the following messages at 8:38 AM

I had a feeling.   :-)   Things do change and directors come and go so if there is a changing of the guard, please keep me in mind for future opportunities.

I give the recruiter props for reaching back with the best letdown message he could come up with under the circumstances.  He is lying and knows that I know he is lying.  

I've burned many bridges in my career.  Some of it was my immaturity.  But some of it was also standing up for myself, setting boundaries and not letting people treat me like crap.  

I cannot say who this company is but I did apply with them in 2015 and also got this after a first-round interview:

It was a pleasure speaking with you to discuss your background and interest in HBR Consulting.  We appreciate your time, attentiveness and patience throughout the interview process.  While we were impressed with your qualifications, we are unable to offer you a position at this time.  We will retain your resume on file and should our needs change, we will contact you.

And then a few months later I was hired by a Big Audit and we engaged said company to work on a project.  It doesn't look like lightening will strike twice though.  

Keeping the Faith

 So it's been 2 years since I was laid off from Big Audit 2.0.  Since then I've talked to a zillion recruiters, had dozens of interviews, and one contract gig.  The contract gig, despite its drama, was more of a liferaft than I ever imagined.  It lets me reframe the narrative from "I've been unemployed since July 2020" to "I've been unemployed since May 2022".  Because without a job, I have no power.  No control over my life.  

To say I'm losing faith is an understatement.  I know I've blown a few interviews, but it doesn't seem mathematically possible to have blown them all so badly that no one will take a chance on me.

To be sure, there have been 5 places this year alone that should have taken me on, based on my experience alone.  Two were even contract gigs which would be low risk if it didn't work out.

• There were interviews given by people who don't know how to conduct an interview.  
• There were interviews where the role described did not match the job description given.
• There was a job interview where one of the interviewer was drinking wine.
• There was a job interview where the interviewer was wearing an ill-fitting T-shirt.
• There was a job interview where the interviewer picked his nose.

In my field, there are a few options.  I can work for a law firm and be a Widget Engineer.  They might call it something different.  If I'm lucky, I can find another Audit or non-law firm company that uses the No-Name Software.  Finally, the last option is to work for one of the consulting firms that get hired for short-term implementation or upgrade projects.

And I'm so ANGRY.  Angry that my Office Nemesis is still employed there.  Angry that he was allowed to bully and harass me with no repercussions.  

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Job History repeats itself

Just wanted to share the not so pleasant news ...My job at Big Audit, along with 400+ other souls, was eliminated.  I got the news June 22 although my last official day was July 5th. 

We knew this might be coming and would have come sooner had COVID-19 not slowed things down a bit.  Like my last job, they outsourced my position to offshore/Not-America. This is just the wave of the future of corporate America.  Same way manufacturing went overseas in the 70s and 80s, other jobs were outsourced in the 90s etc.  Same as it's always been.

I should have been safe because I work with Federal Data that cannot be accessed by 3rd party or non-citizens (or non-employees of KPMG but the got around this by making offshore legit KPMG employees). Whatever your political viewpoint, the Trump Administration relaxing of regulations lead directly to the elimination of my job. 

I'm less mad about that than I am that my Office Nemesis got to keep his job but I lost mine. He made my life a living hell for the last 3+ years and it didn't need to be that way.  Poor leadership enabled him and lack of oversight empowered him. 

Anyway, there is never a good time to lose a job but in the middle of COVID-19 things are moving slower than ever.  Luckily we are good savers and don't spend money too frivolously so we are okay for now.  Hopefully something comes along that is a similar job where I could work from anywhere but this was a unicorn opportunity not likely to be repeated.

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Not the best weather this summer

The weather this summer was, to use the technical term, sucky.  For every decent, comfortable day we had two days of either rain or hot and sometimes both.  There weren't as many sit on the front/back porch and enjoy my coffee moments like last year.  On top of that, it wasn't always possible to let the kids spend time in the backyard burning off energy.

With the weather so sucky, It was hard to get anything done around the house.  As I've said before to get things done around here, I need the intersection of appropriate weather, daylight, energy and my kids NOT being here.  I was often in short supply of three-fourths of those items.

Though I consider it done, I still have to touch up the porch somewhat.  I want to install the quarter rounds and I really should paint those lattices.

This summer I sold a few things using Letgo and Facebook Marketplace.  Yesterday I even bought something.  Nightingale wasn't sure when I showed it to her but she declared it a good buy once she sat in it.  The kids also like it, especially Natasha because she can get all cozy in it.

When I only WFH on Fridays, if I didn't get some project done, I had to wait a week.  Since moving to 100% WFH, if I don't get to it on Monday, I can try again on Tuesday.  or Wednesday.  etc.

Tomorrow I have to go into the office for the first time in a month and the second time since Memorial Day.  Our director is in for something and he wants to meet me in person.  I'm not sure what to expect.

I have to admit, this week and two weeks ago have been my best weeks at Big Audit Firm.  It's no coincidence it is because my colleague is out on PTO.


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Changes at the Office and home

So I made it through year number two at Big Audit.   It has been rough from almost day one.   I realize belatedly that one of the reasons Headless Nick was so cold towards me was, from his perspective, I was replacing him.

 So a week or so ago my PML forwarded me an email from the person who manages hoteling in the Chicago office.  Note: they reach out to our PMLs instead of to us directly.  This is one more sign of how dysfunctional things are at Big Audit.

I'll miss the white board and coat cubby

The issue was they wanted to move some tax group into my area, which would mean relocating me.  At the same time,  Hoteling Dude asked if I really needed a permanent seat since my utilization was under the threshold.  I could come to the office and hunt for a desk, but that doesn't make sense.  I do not work with anybody in the Chicago office and coming to the office is really just a thing I did to make Headless Nick happy and provide me some structure.

When I started in 2016, we could somehow get the kids to daycare and get to work between 8 and 8:20, especially with my mom helping out in nicer weather.  However, as the kids have gotten older and are learning to test limits, getting them to daycare has become a longer battle ordeal in the mornings.  I simply cannot get to work anywhere in the zip code of On Time.

Anywho, I'm giving up my desk at the office and WFH more.  Until they officially take my desk away, my plan is to go into the office a couple times mid-week.  Eventually I will switch to full time at home, unless and until the rumored restructure impacts me. 


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Post Memorial Day Wrap up

We had a busy Memorial Day weekend.  First, my mom left our house Friday at some point and didn't return until Monday so that was an extra bonus.  I know that sounds mean reader from the future but there is a distinct difference in the overall mood when my mom is not around.

Katness and family came over late Saturday evening and we grilled hamburgers.  On Sunday we went to a friends annual MD cookout.  On Monday Nightingale got the idea, based on our On This Day FB reminder, to go out to breakfast at our local diner and then take the bus to the beach.  It was a close to spontaneous as a couple with two 2-yr olds can be (you still have to pack a ton of stuff).


It definitely wore the kids out.  They napped so well Monday afternoon that it was hard to wake them up.

A lot of companies in Corporate America have figured out that people get even lazier during the summer so they come up with summer hours.  My current place (Big Audit) does the leave two hours early on Friday thing.  We are supposed to make those hours up during the week but either you are busy enough or you aren't.

Last year Headless Nick never brought up this perk.  I did ask him about it once and he was very nonchalant, saying that people do it if they are caught up.  The thing is, he liked to work.  He would come in at 9 and stay until 6 which equals my 5 pm.  During Kickoff Friday, he would stay until his 4, which was my 3.  So skipping lunch to leave early wasn't an option.  He just couldn't understand why someone wouldn't want to take advantage of the distraction-free time to get some real work done.

Update:  Based on information receive much later, I have determined that Headless Nick was staying around late because his girlfriend was finishing up her tasks and they shared a car.  That doesn't negate him being a prick about expecting others to work on his schedule, but it at least paints him as less of a workaholic and just more of an obtuse person.

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Time to stop letting former colleague live Rent-Free in my head

About a year ago I started a new job.  It's probably about as close to my dream job as I'm gonna get in this lifetime.  I have a lot of autonomy, am paid well and enjoy good benefits.  It's still work and there are the usual Corporate America frustrations that come with most white collar office jobs. 

That said, there was one conflict I had to deal with.  An overzealous coworker who was also assigned to be my mentor and unofficial supervisor.

I'm gonna call him Nearly Headless Nick like the ghost from the Harry Potter series.  He wasn't a bad guy and we got along well enough except in the power struggle area.  My real boss has a lot on his plate and asked Nearly Headless to manage me.  He took this task to heart and really tried to over-manage me.

I don't want this to be a gripe about a coworker but I want to point out one form of psychological warfare he played on me.   My team is on the East Coast and I work in our Chicago office.   So we do the majority of our interaction electronically.  Email, Instant Messenger and phone. 

Over a two week period of time, I would come into the office, sit at my desk from 8am (okay 8ish) and not get up until 1, 2 or 3 in the afternoon to take lunch.  No matter when I took lunch (full disclosure I eat lunch at my desk but then go to the gym next door to get some semblance of a workout in), I would come back to an IM and email asking me for something. 

I don't know what the odds are of this happening but it has to be an incredible coincidence that he didn't need anything from me until I left my desk! 

The coworker is long gone.  But he is still living rent-free in my head.  I get stressed out in the morning when I'm trying to get my kids to daycare and get to work on time.  I stress when I go to work out and the elevator takes a little longer, or God forbid I spent a little too much time in the post-workout sauna. To be clear, I'm not spending hours at the gym, I either run 3 miles or swim 10 laps, that's about all I can manage in an hour when you factor in clothes changing and showering.  Even with the gym right next door, it takes the better part of 10 minutes to get from my desk to the locker room.

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Maybe it's a different 80-20 Rule I'm thinking of here

The 80-20 rule, or Pareto Principle as it is known in some circles, can be summed up as 80 percent of the output comes from 20 percent of the input.  Another way to look at it is in terms of distribution: 80 percent of your results will fall within 20 of a parameter.


When I worked at the FBN Consulting Company, one of the things the mentors tried to instill was a get in front of the client and show them how much you are dedicated to working on their issues.  The idea was to be proactive but more so to show the client that they are getting value for the money we are charging them.  This manifested itself in a variety of ways but one that comes to mind was the constant push to communicate what you are doing for the customer as much as possible.

I'm not really explaining it right so an example.  Let's say Marty at ABC Widget Company calls at 8 am because he has a problem.  Clients rarely called to ask how your weekend was.  The mentor would assess if the problem was career advancing, interesting or just a routine issue.  If it was the later, it would be assigned to the Field Engineer (me).  My mentor would literally assign me the work order at 8:33 and then at 8:40 ask me if I've contacted the client yet.  Usually the answer was yes I called him.

"Did you call his office or his cell phone?" 

*  This was back when cell phones were common but not necessary the predominant form of contact they are today and certainly not smart phones (the pre iPhone Era).  AT best you had a feature phone.  Either way, the primary source of contact was usually their office number.

Whichever I used, he would tell me to call the other.  "And send him an email too."

This is one of those paradigms that follows the 80-20 rule.  It's gonna work as expected with 8 out of 10 people and its gonna apply to about 80% of the issues, problems and questions clients have. 

I might be projecting a little of myself here, but some people really only want progress reports when there is actual forward progress to report.  In other words, repeating what you told me an hour ago with no new news or telling me what you plan to do doesn't really tell me anything I don't already know and just wastes my time. 

So now we know

I'm writing these entries as they happen and as I have time to jot things down but I may not publish until months from now (or ever). Note: This post was written a year or so ago, when the events were still fresh.  I waited for a while to post this because I didn’t want to risk my job hunting efforts or reveal any information about my former company.  The purpose of these posts aren't to bash my former employer but to share my experience.

 So we had another all hands meeting the

As part of the firm’s objective to attain sustainable growth and profitability, we are announcing a new operating model for our IT function. Now known as Business Technology, our new holistic IT model will improve our core IT functions, allowing us among other things to serve as a strategic partner to our service lines; evolve the firm’s key technology and free up assets for reinvesting in our business.

 

As part of our new Business Technology model, we are partnering with TopperTwins , one of the world’s largest IT services companies. This partnership will provide us with technology capabilities that are more in line with industry best practices and will enhance our competitiveness with scalable solutions that enable growth, innovation and help drive distinctive client service.

 

Business Technology organization

Our new Business Technology organization is broken into four verticals, which consist of:

·         Enterprise Architecture;

·         Information Security and Risk Management;

·         Business Technology Operations & Governance; and

·         Business Technology Services aligned to our service lines of Audit, Tax, Advisory and Internal Client Services. The Business Technology Services leaders will become integral partners embedded with their respective businesses to become fluent in the service lines’ core strategies.

 

Field services

Business Technology Operations will oversee data-driven rigorous field services that are provided through Capgemini. These services are designed for high responsiveness, remote service desk operations and maximized utilization.

 

Our field operations will consist of field technicians along with on-demand and scheduled dispatch services to provide extended support. Whether it is helping you resolve a hardware issue, providing you in-office or meeting-site technical support, or application or software assistance, you will have leading services at your fingertips.

 

Next steps

Our next steps include three phases:

1.     We are immediately beginning several weeks of transition planning with our third-party services provider.

2.     Upon planning completion, we will begin transition execution of our new Business Technology model in a phased approach through March 2016. This will ensure a smooth transition that is minimally disruptive to the business.

3.     Post-busy season, we will phase data center migration through early fiscal year 2017.

 

During our transition, you will receive regular updates on our progress along with any changes in processes and relevant training. We will be updating our Knowledge Technology Support Center in the coming days with frequently asked questions and additional resources throughout the transition.

 

On behalf of our new Business Technology organization, we look forward to working with you and propelling TopFive into the future.